Empowered selfcare, lifestyle strategies & coaching
What happens when sacred traditions become trendy? For Black women, self-care is more than a buzzword — it’s survival, resistance, and ancestral legacy. But today, we’re witnessing a disturbing shift: mainstream wellness industries are colonizing our sacred rituals, turning them into commodities while erasing their …
While Black History Month may have come to a close, the lived experiences of being Black in America, particularly as a Black woman, continues to be one of resilience, strategy and survival-surviving institutional racism and state sanctioned violence. Taking all that into account means, we’ve got to love and selfcare in such a way that we’re able to elevate beyond these realities. Radial selfcare and selflove, as oringinated and articulated by Audre Lourde, are what we are called upon to embody.
In a world that often demands relentless strength from Black women, embracing self-care is not merely a luxury but a revolutionary act of self-preservation and empowerment. Prioritizing one’s well-being can lead to profound improvements in mental, emotional, and physical health, enabling Black women to reclaim their health, happiness, and power. In essence, selfcare is liberation for Black women and that, is not an exaggeration.
Self-care involves intentional actions to nurture one’s mental, emotional, and physical health. For Black women, it serves as a vital tool to counteract the effects of systemic racism, societal expectations, and the “strong Black woman” stereotype, which often pressures them to prioritize others over themselves. Engaging in self-care can mitigate stress, reduce health disparities, and enhance overall quality of life. However, unsurprisingly, the same socio-cultural and environmental issues that are the cause of these issues, also function to stymy efforts to address them.
Despite its importance, several barriers often impede Black women from practicing self-care namely:
The “strong Black woman” narrative or trope can lead to feelings of guilt or shame when prioritizing personal needs. It’s also rooted in white supremacy and misogyny. It’s also important to note that due to the intersectional nature of the Black woman experience, these pressures are replicated within the black community and adds another layer of pressure to a group of women who are already exhausted and carrying generational exploitation.
Some of our cultural norms discourage seeking mental health support or engaging in self-care, often viewing it as self indulgence or selfishness. In fact, the community wide conditioning that Black women have historically been subjected to, has also negatively impacted our overall health and well being.
Mainstream selfcare is problematic on many fronts. First, at its core is both white supremacy and misogyny. Secondly, this toxic version of selfcare, discriminatory and exploitative. This version by its very nature, further exploits women by upholding the the toxic roots of the system it operates within. This colonized version of selfcare
Building a supportive network that is divested from the oppressive systems in which black folks exist, is crucial. Engaging with communities that understand and share similar experiences can offer validation and encouragement. Platforms like Sad Girls Club and Therapy for Black Girls provide spaces for connection and mental health support. In order to heal and thrive as Black women, it is time we normalize “closing” our practices in order to build safe spaces for us to heal, nourish and break the toxic cycles of conditioning under which many within our community, continue exist under.
Even today, Black and Brown bodies are forced to deal with medical racism and despite the tremendous body of work regarding the damage it inflicts, it remains a troubling issue. Access to culturally competent mental health professionals can make a significant difference. Therapists who understand the unique challenges faced by Black women can offer personalized strategies for self-care and empowerment. Not only this, but studies have demonstrated that healthcare outcomes are significantly higher and far more successful, under the care of Black and POC healthcare providers.
Embracing self-care is a transformative act that enables Black women to reclaim their health, happiness, and power. By acknowledging and overcoming barriers, implementing effective self-care strategies, and seeking supportive communities and professional help, Black women can foster resilience and well-being in the face of systemic challenges. Ultimaetly, selfcare is liberation for Black women when we decolonize our ancient ways of healing and replenishing both ourselves, and our communities. In it, we recognize the interconnectedness of all life as well as the earth. These indigenous practices, emphasize balance, renewal, reciprocity, and rest.
1. Community Care: (Sista Afya, Chicago area)
2. Therapy For Black Girls: (An extensive guide and database for Black women in need of mental health services, etc.)
3. The Nap Ministry: Explores the sacred act of rest, mindfulness, etc.
4. The Healing Justice Practice Space: Offers community-based healing initiatives.
Embracing wellness As we wind down the holiday season this Christmas, let’s remember to selfcare and do it, unapologetically! Now more than ever, it’s critical that women normalize selfcare beyond the holidays. Historically women have carried the emotional, physical and mental labor of caring for …
Things are rapidly changing across the globe and many of the issues and challenges that are unique to women, continue to grow. From socio-political unrest to domestic violence, women, children and the elderly are at the forefront. This makes it critically important that emergency selfcare …
Navigating a toxic workplace can be overwhelming, especially for Black women who often face additional stressors like microaggressions, bias, and the pressure to overperform. Prioritizing self-care is essential to protecting your mental, emotional, and physical well-being. Below, I’m highlighting five key self-care strategies, practical examples, and tools to help you not just survive but thrive!
One of the most critical self-care practices in a toxic workplace is learning to set and maintain boundaries. A toxic workplace can drain your energy and blur the lines between personal and professional time. What’s not spoken about enough, is the degree to which these effects are amplified for Black women.
Example: If you’re frequently contacted outside of work hours, politely but firmly communicate that you are unavailable after a certain time. Also, set expectations from the beginning by asking questions and making it known that you’re unavailable outside of work. Don’t allow supervisors, etc to intimidate you into accepting this kind of harmful behavior. I address some strategies for how to go about this right here
Solution-Based Tool: Use apps like “Google Calendar“ or “Todoist“ to schedule your work hours and block off time for yourself. Set reminders to help you stick to these boundaries and prevent burnout.
Microaggressions—subtle, often unintentional discriminatory comments or behaviors—can chip away at your self-esteem over time. Addressing them can be uncomfortable, but it’s essential to stand up for yourself in a way that maintains your peace.
Example: When someone makes a stereotypical remark, calmly respond with, “I know you may not realize it, but that comment can be hurtful. I’d appreciate it if we could avoid these types of generalizations.”
Solution-Based Tool: “The Microaggressions Tracker” is a tool that allows you to log instances of microaggressions, helping you document patterns and responses over time. This can also assist in identifying recurring issues that may need to be escalated to HR.
Mindfulness and stress management techniques are crucial in navigating toxic environments. Practicing mindfulness helps you stay grounded, even in high-pressure situations.
Example: Before entering a tense meeting, take a few moments to breathe deeply, center yourself, and mentally prepare. You can also take short “breath breaks” during your workday to reset.
Solution-Based Tool: Download meditation apps like “Calm” or “Headspace” to guide you through quick mindfulness exercises or breathing techniques. Even a 5-minute daily practice can make a significant difference in managing stress levels.
Finding allies in and out of the workplace is critical. Lean on trusted friends, family members, or professional networks of Black women who understand your experience. This community can offer encouragement, perspective, and advice.
Example: Join online support groups, such as “Sister Circle”, where Black women share resources and discuss coping mechanisms for toxic work environments.
Solution-Based Tool: Use platforms like “LinkedIn” to join professional groups like “Black Women Connect” or “Black Career Women’s Network”. These networks provide mentorship opportunities, career advice, and emotional support. Believe it or not, this will go a long way in helping you feel empowered as you navigate these workplace challenges with confidence and more safety.
Your well-being should never take a backseat to a toxic job. Whether it’s through regular exercise, therapy, or simply getting enough sleep, maintaining your health is a form of resistance against burnout. For most of my clients, including myself, this can be one of the most challenging aspects of your selfcare journey as a Black woman. This is where strategy and community really come into play.
Example: Set a weekly routine that includes physical activity, even if it’s just a 30-minute walk during your lunch break. Consider speaking with a therapist who specializes in the unique challenges faced by Black women. It’s extremely important to utilize every available resource both in and outside the workplace (i.e. your EAP, etc).
Solution-Based Tool: Use apps like “BetterHelp” for accessible, affordable online therapy sessions, or try “MyFitnessPal” to track your physical activity and nutrition. Both tools can help you stay accountable and prioritize your health, no matter how busy your schedule gets.
While navigating a toxic workplace can be challenging, adopting these self-care strategies will help you maintain your mental, emotional, and physical well-being. Remember: self-care is not selfish—it’s necessary for survival and success. Whether you’re setting boundaries, addressing microaggressions, or leaning on your community, these tools will empower you to thrive despite workplace toxicity. You can read another helpful post on this topic right here
Unfortunately, we live in a world that continues to exist under both patriarchy and anti-blackness, but rather than waiting for things to “change” there are strategies, tools, etc that we can use to improve our lives. For Black women, that range is a continuum of selfcare strategies and other tools we can employ to thrive rather than just survive. You deserve to work in an environment where you feel valued and respected. One thing to note? That can also include a literal change of environment and or location. The real question becomes, what’s the best toolkit/ strategy for you. If you need help or guidance with that, click here.
We’re well into the summer, and the dry air, heat, etc can be brutal on those locks sis! Since I’m always on the hunt for natural alternatives, I’ve found 5 natural ingredients for healthy hair, that seem to always score at the top of my …
Emergency selfcare is a response to the rapidly changing circumstances taking place across the globe. Many of these issues and challenges are unique to women and continues to remind us that selfcare strategies must adapt to these changes.
It’s been a long time coming but for a variety of reasons more black women are traveling the world and even choosing to become permanent expats. Statistically, black women are some of the highest educated and accomplished folks in the United States. Arguably, social media and other platforms have also played a role in this trend. By connecting more women to communities across the globe, they are being shown that they too, have options. Navigating the realities of anti-blackness and institutionalized racism, black women are beginning to reevaluate the whole notion of the American dream. Additionally, the covid pandemic drove home some hard truths about healthcare disparities, inequity, work-life balance, etc .
Black women working in the service industry and frontline jobs faced unique challenges during the COVID-19 pandemic. Many worked in sectors with higher exposure to the virus, such as healthcare, retail, and hospitality. They often experienced higher rates of job insecurity, reduced hours, and increased health risks.
Moreover, the closure of schools and increased caregiving responsibilities disproportionately affected black women, as they were more likely to be single parents or primary caregivers. The digital divide also posed challenges for remote work and education, further exacerbating disparities.
Generally, women were disproportionately affected in terms of job losses, increased caregiving responsibilities, and challenges accessing healthcare. These impacts were often more pronounced in lower-income communities and sectors with a high representation of women.
However, black women were the hardest hit in service and many frontline roles. They often faced a combination of economic, health, and caregiving challenges, highlighting the intersectionality of gender and race and the impact of the pandemic. Remember, most service based, healthcare, and education, etc professions are largely women, particularly black and other women of color. Given the socio-cultural, history and politics of the U.S., it’s no great surprise that these groups were the most negatively impacted by the pandemic.
As the politics and seedy underbelly of America’s past raises its head, black women are realizing that, the very progress that has been made in terms of social justice, equality and gender equity, are being rolled back. With that knowledge comes the need to create community and resources for addressing this reality. One of the consequences of this is the trending exodus of black women from the U.S. and, an exploration of the world in search of better options. Traveling the world is a movement and a response to the realities of a nation that refuses to address its own issues.
Black women traveling the world is a powerful manifestation of recognizing that you have options and resourcefulness, is your middle name. For black women, travel as well as even becoming permanent expats, is also a form of selfcare and selflove. For most black Americans, the U.S. is the toxic and traumatic ex you want to ditch. Well, for black women tired of laboring on behalf of everyone else, they are choosing to go with another option. That option is travel and, in some cases, expatriation to places across the globe that will allow us to thrive in relative safety and security. Read my latest post on my Merida selfcare vacation right here!
As a collective, Black people have always been explorers and travelers, for centuries. That remains true, even today. Some is due to political and economic distress, and some is by choice. More recently, Black women are adding travel and exploration to their selfcare toolkit. For many, travel is a release and escape from unchecked capitalism, institutional racism, workplace toxicity, and marginalization. Selfcare has become a revolutionary act for a lot of Black women. Particularly, those who are awakening to the fact that they don’t have to stay in spaces where they are unsafe and marginalized. Yes, it’s a “privilege” for many of us in the West, but that too is changing for women globally as more women expand their selfcare toolkits. Make no mistake; not every “selfcare” toolkit requires travel. A simple change of physical location, a safe space, etc, will also suffice.
Yes, racism and anti-blackness are global. However, when it comes to “degrees” of this ish, the USA , has a monopoly. The fact that this poison is so foundational and intertwined with the history of this country, is daunting. The work, blood, and sacrifices that Black people have put into this country is something this nation is yet to reconcile. Against that context, Black women have toiled and sacrificed enough, and many have decided that it’s time to lay down the super woman cape and focus on healing and thriving. This journey of selfcare and selflove, is one that many women across the globe are beginning to embrace. Needless to say, those who have exploited female labor, reproduction, etc are not pleased. The rollback of women’s rights globally, rape culture, attacks on women’s reproductive rights, etc, are all in response to women coming together to reclaim their place in humanity.
Reflections on my Selfcare vacation I’m closing out my selfcare Merida vacation by making sure I hit some of the local sights. Manifesto coffee does not disappoint here in centro historical de Merida. It’s got cute and cozy vibes coupled with a sense of safety …
