Black History Month: A selfcare message to Black Women
Wrapping up Black History Month
While Black History Month may be coming to a close, the lived experiences of being Black in America, particularly as a Black woman, continue to be one of resilience, strategy, and survival-surviving institutional racism and state-sanctioned violence. Taking all that into account means, we’ve got to love and selfcare in such a way that we’re able to elevate beyond these realities. Radial selfcare and selflove, as originated and articulated by Audre Lourde, are what we are called upon to embody. This selfcare message for Black women is in the spirit of radicalism audacity that Audre expressed and lived her life by.
There’s no “neutral” in selfcare
365 days a year Black people exist in Black bodies and live in the context of a society that is patriarchal, racist, and anti-black. But each day, Black joy, education, culture, and community manage to rise above all of that. For Black women, generations of toiling and being the center of all the demands of maintaining and protecting all of “this”, has come at great cost. Exhaustion, overwhelm, unfillment, resentment, poor health, and many early deaths, are just a few of the costs we’ve borne. Many are finally awakening and breaking the conditioning associated with this. Also, they’re realizing that true selfcare radicalizes the practitioner. Decolonized selfcare is intentional, multifocal, and accepts no compromise in its implementation.
About decolonized selfcare
For black folks, “accessing” selfcare was denied to us for well over 400 plus years, due in large part to chattel slavery, systemic racism, and oppression. Through its oppressive institutions of both exclusion and exploitation, many Black women have carried the weight of having to create, excel, and live despite all of this. Wage gaps, discriminatory practices in the workplace, healthcare, access to leisure, selfcare, etc. are just a few of the battles we’ve had to fight on the daily. decolonized selfcare both acknowledges these realities and actively opposes these structures unapologetically. It is not neutral and there is no hiding that fact.
More on decolonized selfcare
So, while it’s great to speak on these issues during Black History Month, the fact remains that selfcare has to be a daily practice that specifically addresses our needs and realities. Decolonized selfcare recognizes that Black bodily autonomy has always been political in a world that actively seeks to oppress and exploit the labor and resources associated with said bodies. The version of selfcare that is promoted by mainstream media and its “influencers” was never meant for us. The fact that many of us, especially Black women, find it so difficult to access it, is a testament to that!
Are you ready to free your mind and body?
Many of us embraced the “side hustle” culture and “Black excellence” to mitigate the effects of job insecurity (workplace discrimination). This is also a strategy for filling in unequal pay gaps. As for time freedom? That’s a luxury many don’t have, given the realities I just mentioned. Are non-Black folks finally getting a taste of what we’ve been experiencing for over 200 years? Yes, but that does not negate the long-term effects of systemic racism that Black people, have experienced as a collective. So, when it comes to the practice of decolonized selfcare, mental and emotional health are critical to our healing. Decolonized selfcare calls for the freeing of your mind from the oppressive constructs we’ve been forced to exist within.
Taking the first step towards your liberating selfcare journey
The first step towards a decolonized selfcare journey begins with self-awareness. More often than not, we’re too caught up on the hamster wheel of hustle culture of capitalism, the mythological Black excellence, the American dream, etc., to be self-aware. We’ve become conditioned to servicing the same systems of oppression that have kept us in bondage. We’re sick, overwhelmed, exhausted, unfulfilled, and living in the constant anxiety of existing in a racist and oppressive society. But, self-awareness is not about giving in to misery or despair. It’s about recognizing the state of both your internal and external world and the situation.
Making the decision to commit to your decolonized selfcare journey
While awareness is the first step on this journey, there is another key consideration: consequences. As a fellow Black woman, I refuse to lie to you. There will be consequences when you choose to prioritize your liberation and health. These can be anything from resentment or hostility from those who have benefited from your lack of selfcare to outright threat of violence.The important thing is to be prepared for the fallout and set up contingency plans. Sometimes, that can even take the form of a personal safety plan, depending on your situation. I don’t say this to discourage anyone. I’m simply reminding us of some of the unique issues we as Black women have to consider. This is also why I recommend getting a mental health professional to help you along your healing journey. In short, you need to get your team together.
