Empowered selfcare, lifestyle strategies & coaching
Summer outfit tips We all get excited for summer getaways this time of the year. But, things can get uncomfortable and ugly if we’re not prepared or fail to pack appropriately. So, today, I felt it was a good idea to share my summer vacation …
A Summer Banana Ice Cream treat Nothing screams summer fun like ice cream! Not only is ice cream huge in my family, but we’re all a little addicted to bananas because bananas and mangoes were a staple growing up in the tropics. These days, I’ve …
It’s that time again and that means bring out the diy moringa face mask, y’all! This is another awesome recipe that tightens pores, evens out the complexion and, is anti-aging. Not only that, this fan favorite also adds lots of moisture and hydration. As always, be sure to check with your dermatologist to make sure you’re not allergic to any of the ingredients. Since I have sensitive combination skin, I always do a small test patch to make sure and you should do the same.
Although I love summer weather, I also know it can age and dry out your skin if you don’t protect and nourish your skin regularly. Also, if you’re not a fan of mystery ingredients, fillers, etc in your skincare, you’ll love this recipe too! Aloe Vera gel, moringa, and rose hip seed oil are the stars of this diy face mask recipe. For me, selfcare does not end with diet and excercise. selfcare also includes ensuring that your skin (a major organ), is gets what it needs too. This is just one of many recipes I’ve created to protect, nourish and fight signs of aging. You can check out another favorite right here (when you click on the link). Also, visit my YouTube channel to watch how I bring these ingredients to life and join my selfcare community!
1. Rose hip seed oil (organic)
2. Aloe Vera gel (organic variety)
4. Kaolin clay (organic, lead free)
5. Vitamin E (food grade supplement)
7. small glass jar with airtight lid (use only for skincare, 15 pack!)
There are so many awesome skincare benefits in this face mask that I’m gonna keep it short and sweet. First of all, the aloe vera gel is super soothing, refreshing and tightens the skin naturally. Not only this, it loaded with nutrients that help calm sensitive skin as well as adds moisture to the skin. For the summer, this is definitely one ingredient I can’t leave out of my skincare routine. The vitamin E, rose hip seed and carrot seed oils, are packed with anti-aging, anti-inflammatory and youth-promoting nutrients that make this this perfect addition to your summer skincare regime.
As always, be sure to do a patch test to make sure you are not allergic to any of the ingredients in this face mask. So, make sure you check with your healthcare provider if you’re not sure or if you’re taking any medications, etc.
After mixing all of the ingredients together until your have a smooth paste, liberally apply it to your face (or body) and leave it on for 10-15 minutes. Again, make sure that you do a patch test to make sure you’re not allergic to any of the ingredients. Next, rinse off the moringa and aloe face mask with tepid water and gently rub it off with your hands in gentle upward sweeps. Then, pat off the excess water and apply our moisturiser and or serum to finish off your treatment.
Easy Prep Summer Summer Snacks It’s okay to get your snack on from time to time as long as it’s a healthy version! For me, spring and summer mean it’s also time to cut down on cooked foods and go more raw. My vegan nutty …
My bone broth story Bone both has always been a thing in my family, so using it as a base for my fish bone broth soup is a no brainier! You can make yours from scratch or use an organic grass fed version from your …
As I continue to celebrate women 365 days a year, I just want to remind men of one thing: women are not your therapists (or therapy). This is true of anyone in a relationship. Your partner is not your therapist and she/he/they is not responsible for you own personal “baggage”. Historically and generationally, women have been conditioned to accept the baggage of their partners in addition to the demands of society and culture.
Because women are viewed (in general) as the nurturing and weaker sex, women are often the default “therapists” for their partners and communities. This is regardless of the fact that we aren’t professionally trained or even paid for that “Labor”. But again, this is the nature of patriarchy and misogyny across the globe. This brings me to the whole “women as default therapists” thing. Not to put the blame all on one side, women have their own issues to deal with as well. My point is that, neither partner is allowed to turn the other into a personal therapist! The emotional demands are just too much and it is unhealthy.
Also, we’ve all seen examples of this in social media and even in our communities. Asking women to be your therapists is a bridge too far to cross and also puts women in further danger. After all, with everything that’s happened during and since the pandemic, the rates or femicide is rising at an alarming rate. And to bring it back to the basics, that amount of emotional dumping is a relationship killer anyways! It leaves no space for real intimacy or caring. This is because one person is doing the “dumping” and the other is the emotional or trauma “dumpster”.
Another red flag is constant negativity and even clingy-ness. It feels like you’re constantly draining off poison from your partner’s wound. The reverse is also true; you can’t constantly dump on your partner and think that that relationship will last!
Look, while I’m no therapist I can definitely see a red flag coming a mile away. But it wasn’t always that way. There was a time that I suffered from both the disease to please and being an “emotional dumpster” for my partner. Needless to say, it was traumatic and added to my own baggage that I failed to work through prior to that relationship. So, when I say women are not your therapists, I’m not joking because I’ve got the “receipts”. For me, it always comes back to selfcare. Selfcare forces you to become both self aware and honest about where you are as a person. That means, facing all your issues and recognising that while no one is perfect, we do have to take ownership for both our trauma (i.e. issues, etc. ) and triumphs.
Like i said earlier, we are all on a journey to healing and wholeness (hopefully) and no one’s perfect. That also means, we have to be honest with ourselves and our partners about where we are in our journey. Sometimes that may even mean you separate because those differences are to big to bridge. When we start taking on the role of therapist, we open ourselves to harm and potential destruction of our relationship. Also, you can create room for co-dependency which is another nightmare to divest from. Just, don’t do it and if you have to ask then you’re probably already there! Bottom line? Leave therapy to the experts and you’ll both be Much more happy and whole.
Selfcare is not restricted to what you can see. Selfcare includes your mental, emotional, spiritual and, physical wellbeing. Also, when it comes to selfcare, know that there is no perfect way to do it and it’s also a continuous process of nourishing, healing and renewal. From time to time, you’ll have to make adjustments along the way and that’s okay. There is no judgment or guilt in any of this. Want to know more about why women struggle with selfcare? Click here to find out. Also, for more helpful selfcare tips and ideas you can read it right here!
A favorite all-weather beverage As we’re breaking into spring I still can’t resit a dose of my gut healthy hot chocolate to get me through those chilly spring mornings here in the Midwest! As most of you know, I love hot healing beverages throughout the …
My rosemary hair growth spray also soothes dry itchy scalp, improves circulation and over all scalp health. If you’ve got natural (unprocessed) 4C hair like me, you’ve love this for freshening up those protective styles too!
Every year we get excited and anxious over Valentine’s Day. Excited because spring is not far off and anxious because, a lot of us are looking to be coupled up! Too much emphasis is on “coupling” and not enough on selflove and selfworth. That’s why it’s also a perfect time to really hone in on self-nourishment and selfcare. So, here’s 5 Valentine’s Day Selfcare ideas to get you through the rest of February. Needless to say, selflove is not a one of but a practice we should carry 365 days a year.
While we celebrate Valentine’s Day as a day for lovers, love and, romance the day itself, has its origins in both pagan and Christian beliefs. The Catholic Church recognises three saints named valentine. But it’s unclear who the actual Valentine was for which the day is named. Who ever it was, he was martyred and became a saint according to catholic tradition. In pagan tradition, it’s actually an offshoot of the feast of Lupercalia, an ancient roman pagan festival held on February 15. While the modern version of Valentines Day is soft and romantic, Lupercalia was anything but! It was violent, bloody, full of animal sacrifice and rampant sex.
But, lets get back to the fun of today and the notion of love and connection. The greatest thing you can do for yourself this Valentine’s Day, is to love and treat yourself how you want to be treated. These 5 Valentine’s Day selfcare ideas are just a few of the many tips and strategies I practice for myself. Let’s face it. If you don’t learn how to love and appreciate yourself, how can you expect others to know this? Standards, boundaries, etc, are all established and depend on you and the way you perceive and value yourself.
When it comes to self love and selfcare, your approach should be similar to how you view Valentine’s Day-a special time for love! Selfcare and self love are special and intimate practices we need to carry out on a daily basis for a healthy mind-body-spirit. Also, how you allow other people to treat you, says something about how you see yourself and the value you attach to yourself. Are you worthy of being treated with respect, compassion, love and consideration? If all of those things are true for you, then you will have no problem expecting others to treat accordingly.
1. Take yourself on a date.
2. Make a selfcare journal.
3. Give yourself a 24 hour social media and technology break.
4. Reconnect with friends and loved ones.
5. shore up and recalibrate your boundaries.
1. Taking yourself on a date is about intentionality and perception. Also, it’s an exercise in learning to feel comfortable with your company and not worry about how other people see you. If you’re feeling super anxious and uncomfortable about going out to a restaurant, theatre, etc by yourself, that’s telling you something. It could be anything from being a people pleaser to someone who who needs other people to give herself value. Getting comfortable with being uncomfortable, forces you to go inwards to the place that need your attention (i.e. healing, etc).
2. Either buy a journal for selfcare or make one for yourself. There are so many ways to customise a journal and make yours for what ever you want. A selfcare journal is a great way to do a self check on a daily basis. Also, you can use it to track your progress in terms of personal growth, documenting things you want to address, and so forth. You can also pour out thoughts without feeling like you’re being judged and it’s literally a space that’s yours alone.
3. Take a 24 hour social media and technology break and stick to it. There’s so much noise and distraction from social media and all of our tech gadgets, that we lose touch with ourselves. Social media keeps us hooked on other people’s drama and lives. Constantly dealing in to social media traps us in comparison and competition mode and disconnected from our own lives and reality. Very little of social media is actual reality and much of it negatively affects our mental health.
When you are always looking at other people’s lives you rarely appreciate or have any gratitude for how far you’ve come. When you take a break from this, you can focus on you, set goals for yourself and take stock of life in general. Unplugging for tech and social means you can get out into nature, connect with other humans in the real world and realise that the world is huge and full of great potential.
4. Reconnecting with friends and loved ones is super important for our mental health. Since humans are social beings, we need real human contact and connection, not scrolling through endless pages of social media. When we spend time talking and socialising with other people we can pour into and support one another. We can share stories and life events as well as gain counsel from trusted people in our social circles. This is also a great way to expand your social circle too, when you get out and about.
5. Finally, shore up your boundaries! Setting healthy boundaries is crucial for not just your mental health, but your overall well-being. It’s how you set the terms of how other people engage with you and how you honour yourself. This is also connected to your self worth and the stories you are telling yourself about yourself! If you struggle wit being a people pleaser, setting boundaries are really hard for you. You can read more about that in a previous post, when you click right here!
As I mentioned before, these 5 Valentine’s Day selfcare ideas are just a few of the many tips and strategies I use to stay aligned and healthy these days. None of it starts out easy, but investing in yourself with help of a coach, counsellor, etc is the first step. Selfcare is a journey that empowers to reclaim all aspects of your life-from your health and wellness, to your sense of self. There’s so much time to get on the right track to transforming your life in a way that’s meaningful for you and will also allow you to reclaim your authentic self. Also, sign up with this link for a FREE 20 min clarity session to help get started on your self are journey!!
People Pleasing It’s no big secret that many of us are either people pleasers or recovering people pleasers. What is new, is that women all over the world, are finally saying enough is enough! While some folks are probably saying, what’s the big deal? The …
