Tag Valentine’s Day selflove

feature image for selfcare beyond Valentine’s Day post

Let me start by asking, can we normalise selfcare beyond Valentine’s Day? I’m like really! It’s a new year and that tired idea of “treating” yourself and calling it selfcare, is old and pathetic at this point. Not only that, it’s costing women their lives, health and happiness! Selfcare has become an increasingly popular term in recent years, but it’s often associated with special occasions like Valentine’s Day. While it’s great to have a day to celebrate love and self-love, the truth is that selfcare is a year-round practice, and it’s something that every woman needs!

The reality of it all

Normalising selfcare beyond Valentine’s Day means recognising that taking care of yourself is not a luxury, but a necessity. It means making self-care a regular part of your daily routine and prioritising it just as much as you would any other important task.

So, how can you normalise self-care beyond Valentine’s Day? Here are a few tips:

  1. Make it a daily habit

Selfcare doesn’t have to be fancy or grand. It can be as simple as taking a few minutes each day to do something that makes you feel good. This could be anything from taking a relaxing bath to practicing yoga to reading a book. The key is to make it a daily habit, so it becomes a natural part of your routine.

  1. Find what works for you

Selfcare looks different for everyone, so it’s important to find what works for you. What makes you feel relaxed and rejuvenated? What helps you recharge after a long day? Some people might find solace in nature, while others might prefer meditation. Experiment with different selfcare practices until you find what resonates with you.

  1. Make time for it

One of the biggest barriers to selfcare is time. It’s easy to put off taking care of ourselves when we have so many other things to do. But the truth is, selfcare is just as important as any other task on your to-do list. Make time for it by scheduling it into your day or week. Treat it like an important appointment that you can’t miss.

Some more tips on selfcare

  1. Let go of guilt

Many women feel guilty about taking time for themselves. We’re conditioned to put others’ needs before our own, but selfcare is not selfish or incidental. It’s critical for our mental, physical, and emotional well-being. Let go of the guilt and give yourself permission to prioritise selfcare.

  1. Create a support system

Selfcare is more fun and effective when you do it with others. Create a support system of friends or family members who are also committed to prioritising selfcare. You can share ideas, motivate each other, and hold each other accountable.

Bottom line, normalising selfcare beyond Valentine’s Day is about recognising that taking care of yourself is a year-round practice. It’s about making self-care a daily habit, finding what works for you, making time for it, letting go of guilt, and creating a support system. By prioritizing self-care, you’ll not only feel better but also be better equipped to handle the challenges that come your way.

Priorities ladies!

I can’t say it enough; selfcare beyond Valentine’s Day needs to be your mantra for the rest of the year. It’s not you being needy, whinny, or some other socio-cultural shaming terminology. This is you making your health and well being, the center of how you move through this world.  For some concrete tips and ideas for creating your own selfcare routine, read this earlier viral post right here!
Selfcare beyond Valentine’s Day blog Pinterest image

Barriers to selfcare for Black and other women of color 

1.  Lack of representation

Women of color may feel that the mainstream wellness industry does not represent their needs and preferences. The lack of representation can lead to feeling excluded, invisible, and not valued. It can also lead to difficulty finding resources that are culturally sensitive and appropriate.

2.  Intersectional discrimination

Women of colour, especially Black women face multiple forms of discrimination, such as racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, and ableism. These forms of oppression can cause stress, anxiety, and trauma, which can make it difficult to prioritise self-care.

  1. Systemic barriers

Women of colour may face systemic barriers to accessing self-care resources, such as limited financial resources, lack of affordable and accessible healthcare, limited access to healthy food options, and lack of safe and supportive environments.

Other barriers to consider

  1. Caregiving responsibilities

Women of colour are often expected to take on caregiving responsibilities for their families and communities, which can make it challenging to find time for self-care. The pressure to put others’ needs before their own can lead to feelings of guilt and self-neglect.

  1. Mental health stigma

Women of colour may face stigma and shame around mental health, which can prevent them from seeking help and support. The fear of being perceived as weak or vulnerable can lead to self-isolation and a reluctance to engage in self-care practices that may benefit their mental health.

My final thoughts

Let’s start a clean slate for this new season by recognising that women are facing a global health crisis. That crisis is the absence of selfcare that has become even more critical in a global system of patriarchy, anti-blackness and misogyny.  For women of colour, they’re are additional barriers to selfcare that need to be recognised and addressed. These barriers include lack of representation, intersectional discrimination, systemic barriers, caregiving responsibilities, and mental health stigma. By acknowledging and addressing these barriers, we can create a better world for all women across the globe! Also, check out this short post more selfcare ideas for newbies!

Selfcare Beyond Valentine’s Day

A day for you

Every year we get excited and anxious over Valentine’s Day. Excited because spring is not far off and anxious because, a lot of us are looking to be coupled up! Too much emphasis is on “coupling” and not enough on selflove and selfworth. That’s why it’s also a perfect time to really hone in on self-nourishment and selfcare. So, here’s 5 Valentine’s Day Selfcare ideas to get you through the rest of February. Needless to say, selflove is not a one of but a practice we should carry 365 days a year.

Valentine’s Day

While we celebrate Valentine’s Day as a day for lovers, love and, romance the day itself, has its origins in both pagan and Christian beliefs. The Catholic Church recognises three saints named valentine. But it’s unclear who the actual Valentine was for which the day is named. Who ever it was, he was martyred and became a saint according to catholic tradition. In pagan tradition, it’s actually an offshoot of the feast of Lupercalia, an ancient roman pagan festival held on February 15.  While the modern version of Valentines Day is soft and romantic, Lupercalia was anything but! It was violent, bloody, full of animal sacrifice and rampant sex.

But, lets get back to the fun of today and the notion of love and connection. The greatest thing you can do for yourself this Valentine’s Day, is to love and treat yourself how you want to be treated. These 5 Valentine’s Day selfcare ideas are just a few of the many tips and strategies I practice for myself. Let’s face it. If you don’t learn how to love and appreciate yourself, how can you expect others to know this? Standards, boundaries, etc, are all established and depend on you and the way you perceive and value yourself.

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The Valentine’s Day and self love connection

When it comes to self love and selfcare, your approach should be similar to how you view Valentine’s Day-a special time for love! Selfcare and self love are special and intimate practices we need to carry out on a daily basis for a healthy mind-body-spirit. Also, how you allow other people to treat you, says something about how you see yourself and the value you attach to yourself. Are you worthy of being treated with respect, compassion, love and consideration? If all of those things are true for you, then you will have no problem expecting others to treat accordingly.

Here are the 5 ideas for Valentine’s Day selfcare

1. Take yourself on a date.

2. Make a selfcare journal.

3. Give yourself a 24 hour social media and technology break.

4.  Reconnect with friends and loved ones.

5. shore up and recalibrate your boundaries.

More on these selfcare ideas

1. Taking yourself on a date is about intentionality and perception. Also, it’s an exercise  in learning to feel comfortable with your company and not worry about how other people see you. If you’re feeling super anxious and uncomfortable about going out to a restaurant, theatre, etc by yourself, that’s telling you something. It could be anything from being a people pleaser to someone who who needs other people to give herself value. Getting comfortable with being uncomfortable, forces you to go inwards to the place that need your attention (i.e. healing, etc).

2. Either buy a journal for selfcare or make one for yourself. There are so many ways to customise a journal and make yours for what ever you want. A selfcare journal is a great way to do a self check on a daily basis. Also, you can use it to track your progress in terms of personal growth, documenting things you want to address, and so forth. You can also pour out thoughts without feeling like you’re being judged and it’s literally a space that’s yours alone.

3. Take a 24 hour social media and technology break and stick to it. There’s so much noise and distraction from social media and all of our tech gadgets, that we lose touch with ourselves. Social media keeps us hooked on other people’s drama and lives.  Constantly dealing in to social media traps us in comparison and competition mode and disconnected from our own lives and reality. Very little of social media is actual reality and much of it negatively affects our mental health.

More on this

When you are always looking at other people’s lives you rarely appreciate or have any gratitude for how far you’ve come. When you take a break from this, you can focus on you, set goals for yourself and take stock of life in general. Unplugging for tech and social means you can get out into nature, connect with other humans in the real world and realise that the world is huge and full of great potential.

Some closing points

4. Reconnecting with friends and loved ones is super important for our mental health. Since humans are social beings, we need real human contact and connection, not scrolling through endless pages of social media. When we spend time talking and socialising with other people we can pour into and support one another. We can share stories and life events as well as gain counsel from trusted people in our social circles. This is also a great way to expand your social circle too, when you get out and about.

5. Finally, shore up your boundaries! Setting healthy boundaries is crucial for not just your mental health, but your overall well-being. It’s how you set the terms of how other people engage with you and how you honour yourself. This is also connected to your self worth and the stories you are telling yourself about yourself! If you struggle wit being a people pleaser, setting boundaries are really hard for you.  You can read more about that in a previous post, when you click right here!

Time for some me time

As I mentioned before, these 5 Valentine’s Day selfcare ideas are just a few of the many tips and strategies I use to stay aligned and healthy these days. None of it starts out easy, but investing in yourself with help of a coach, counsellor, etc is the first step. Selfcare is a journey that empowers to reclaim all aspects of your life-from your health and wellness, to your sense of self.  There’s so much time to get on the right track to transforming your life in a way that’s meaningful for you and will also allow you to reclaim your authentic self. Also, sign up with this link for a FREE 20 min clarity session to help get started on your self are journey!!

5 Valentine’s Day Selfcare Ideas

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